I’ve been married for over 26 years, and I’ll be honest, I always thought renewing your vows was a bit of a gimmick, or couples only did them as they had drifted apart…. but oh no…… since being a wedding celebrant, my eyes have been opened and I’m loving it!
It seems to be a hot topic of conversation amongst so many. There seems to be 100’s of reasons why couples want to do this, and it’s a very personal thing.
So here are some of the reasons why:
Maybe you didn’t get the opportunity on your wedding day to
declare your endless love for one another, or perhaps you have had a brush with life itself, and don’t want to take anything for granted.
Life is a rollercoaster and sometimes we go through difficult times, and renewing our vows can bring us back on track, ready to move forward in the same direction. For others, it might be because time is not on their side. You might start re-evaluating your life and appreciate what you have built together and want to celebrate that.
It can be a way of reconnecting yourselves to each other and starting again. Some people wait for a special anniversary or milestone, or they are at a start of a new chapter in their married life.
I chatted with a man in his 30’s recently, and he told me he takes his Mrs’s away every anniversary and they make new promises each year. They acknowledge that they are always changing as individuals and want to make sure they stay connected moving forward. How gorgeous is that… we all want to be married to him!
So uhmmm, yes this has got me thinking. I got married in the mid 90’s in the English summertime…. in the rain! We were well and truly on a budget and let’s just say it wasn’t really a stress free wedding. The old gangster car that I had hired, my one big expense, broke down days before our big day, so was unavailable. So, I got a lift in my brother in laws works car. Yes, ok I got my money back, and the backup car was very nice, but it wasn’t quite what I had envisaged. Our photographer was a family friend, and we got some great snaps of the guests, but unfortunately to this day I have never displayed any wedding photos of us both. They sit safely in my album in the cupboard, blemishes, and all! So, when I rock up at weddings these days, and I see how things have changed I feel a slight pull to go and do it all again myself! Don’t’ get me wrong, we had a lovely day, and I have no regrets, but things change, and we certainly have as individuals.
So, what would I change if I were to do it again? Our vows would include what a bloody good job we have done with the children, and as super proud parents we would want them to be very much part of our celebrations. A professional photographer would be at the top of my list, so I would have to have my hair and makeup done obviously, and perhaps a new frock!!!
I’m also a funeral celebrant (a beautiful and rewarding role might I add). I see families disabled by grief through the service, but when the photo tribute slide show plays, smiles appear through the tears and proud moments are revisited. The wedding photos are always displayed. It’s a beautiful moment. We take photos all the time, but when we take photos we don’t realise their significance in later years and how important those snap shots are.
For us, our 26 years of rollercoaster married life is entering a new chapter. Our children are now independent young adults thriving and living life and we have just become grandparents. It’s our time again now, but of course we are very different people these days. Renewing our wedding vows would be a beautiful declaration of our love and respect for one another, and a reminder of our successes, as together we are strong, and together we seem to accomplish most things.
Also if we renew our vows, I might get some photos to display around the house, and the plus side is, a good photographer can make me look a bit younger!
So in summary, renewals of vows can be intimate or bursting at the seams with family and friends and it can be a time to ‘re-set’ and move forward.
So, if you want to renew your vows, and have questions or just want to get on with it, get in touch with us at the Marriage Office Mandurah, at our boutique wedding venue where we offer affordable wedding services